My game collection is an eclectic mess. I never really figured out how to specialize in one given genre so I like to hop around and get a little bit of everything. If a middle aged woman watched me play the following games from my collection, these are the assumptions that she would probably make:

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3

Boys your age sure like guns don’t they? Why don’t you just go and join the Army? I was in kindergarten during the Cuban Missile crisis. I don’t remember much.


Now, I don’t want to sound like a negative-Nancy, but this game is a teeny bit sacrilegious. Although it does make men realize that if they cheat they will be thrown into a special circle of hell, just like Pastor Dave says.

Sakura Wars

Can you explain why there are giant robots on the streets of 1920s New York City? Oh it’s a video game? I thought video games were supposed to be like real life.

Mass Effect

This game has a lot of talking in it. I kind of feel like I am watching The Mentalist, although the Mentalist never kicks people out of windows when he gets angry.

LA Noire

How many times can you look at a naked female body under the guise of “police detective work?” I am disappointed.

Final Fantasy 13

Finally, a game with a strong female lead. That Hope sure is letting young woman know that they too can make a difference too.

Kirby’s Epic Yarn

Well isn’t this cute? It is like I am exploring my scrapbooking room and having an adventure. I think I’ll buy this for my niece and nephew for Christmas.

A Boy and His Blob

I’m beginning to think you may be using these last two games to lure children to your house. Are you a pedophile?